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Explore a sample system

One minute: you, or a part?

Watch your thoughts for about a minute, see whether they sounded like you at your calmest or like a part, and ask that part for one small thing it needs.

6 steps, drawn from 3 books on IFS.

Checked: each step was read against the book passages it rests on, and stays inside them.

Read every step first
  1. Watch for a minute. For about a minute, just watch your thoughts go by. Do not try to change them. Notice what they say and how they sound. When the minute feels done, jot a few words.
  2. You, or a part? Think back over that minute. Did the thoughts sound like your Self, the leader at the center of you? Or like a part had taken over? That is when feeling overreactive, indecisive or stuck is most likely. Either answer is useful.
  3. A part, not all of you. If it was a part, that is fine. It is one part of you, not the whole of you, and you are more than it. You noticed it, and that already gives a little room.
  4. One small thing. Ask the part, kindly: what is one thing I could do right now to help you? Then wait, without answering for it. If your thoughts sounded calm, ask any part that feels worried. If nothing comes, that is okay.
  5. How loud is it now? The same scale you used at the start. A drop is worth noticing, and no change is fine too: for a minute you watched it instead of only being it.
  6. Back to your day. If it feels true, thank the part for whatever it let you know. Do the small thing if you can, and only promise what you mean to do. Then notice the room around you.